On Leaving America – Part 35

The House That’s Trying To Kill Me

When the carpet layers redid out floors they turned off a valve that let gas into our living room fireplace so they could put carpet around it. Naturally the pilot light went out. Lighting it again is a bit complicated, never done it before and of course the instructions that were always under the TV have disappeared to God knows where. Will cost $60 for the guy to come out and restart it.
To make the week still more interesting our garbage grinder [new-installed last year] has decided to come loose from the sink. I have installed one before but this one looks strange. Something beyond my laymen’s knowledge has happened to it.
Two days ago my wife informed me there’s a leak in one of our twin bathroom sinks. New faucets were also instilled last year. I looked under the sink and found a carpet of ugly black mold. Another messy clean up. I looked but can’t find where the leak is coming from or why. A single drop comes down from somewhere about every five minutes. Another job for the plumber—guess he can look at the grinder too.
Later I moved a small throw rug that’s been on the floor of another bathroom and found a yellow stain where it used to be. Surrounding floor was sun bleached. Estimate for new linoleum in bathroom – $ 600
After ten straight days of rain, paint has started to peel off our garage doors. Looks bad and I’m unable to fix until it stops raining. Sometimes it never stops raining in Seattle. It’s snowing in Sweden. More than it ever has before—more than a yard so far this year. Another climate change.
We have a vaulted ceiling in the front room and this morning we discovered five hairline cracks that are totally visible . . . need to recall the painter who did front room and kitchen six months ago . . . another expense. In the meantime fourteen realtors have come with prospective buyers . . . no serious offers. Yard is too small. One bedroom is too big, another is too small. One buyer was disturbed by a 100 year old Swedish rifle I had hanging on the wall. One woman was allergic to cats. Windows look old, one said. One didn’t like the color of the house.
I should have burned the place . . . or myself—some kind of Buddhist protest in honor of all those trying to sell a house in this economy.
Reality Cards Will this never end!

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About Bruce Louis Dodson

Bruce Louis Dodson is an American expat now living in Borlänge, Sweden with his wife, cat and dog. He is an artist and world traveler who writes fiction and poetry and practices photography in his less than copious free time. His work has appeared in: Barely South Review - Boundaries Issue, Blue Collar Review, Pulsar Poetry (UK), Foliate Oak, Breadline Press West Coast Anthology . The E-buffet, Qarrtsiluni, Struggle Magazine, Pearl Literary Magazine, Contemporary Literature Review: India, 3rd Wednesday, Sleeping Cat Books - Trip of a Lifetime Anthology, Northern Liberties Review, Authors Abroad - Foreign & and Far Away Anthology, The Path, Page & Spine, The Crucible, Sleeping Cat Books -Trips of a Lifetime, Vine Leaves, Pirene's Fountain,Tic Toc Anthology - Kind of a Hurricane Press, Cordite Poetry Review, Buffalo Almanac and mgv2.
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6 Responses to On Leaving America – Part 35

  1. lgyslaine says:

    Sell ​​a house or apartment is never easy it is obvious. Here we are shown frequently on television, how to sell his house quickly, repeating some paintings, changing the decor and depersonalizing the house etc … good luck

  2. Bruce – it sounds like a nightmare, but it will come to an end – everything does!!!! You only need one person, who at this moment is still looking for the house they really want!
    While it lasts, it seems endless. Cheer yourself up by going on line and looking for houses in beautiful Sweden…sometimes it’s only dreams that keep us going…Thinking of you….

  3. Alice says:

    Someone will be looking for the right home and find you. I am always amazed at the rudeness of others and thoughtless comments.

  4. Maybe the house does not want you to move. Saying in its own way “Don’t leave me”

  5. While I giggle, I truly truly feel for you. I had similar s*** (stuff) happen and the grind is so trying. I too had my pilot light go out and even though I had clear instructions was unable to re-light. When the guy came to fill up the gas tank, I had him do it. I noticed there were one or two steps missing in the written instructions. One thing I do know which is very important** – Snow is way better than rain so just keep your eyes on the prize!

  6. It took me a year to sell my house. We put it up for sale in Spring 2009 and it sold in summer of 2010. Never thought the place would sell and we had remodeled everything except the Living Room and Dining Room. Heard the same stories as you — one room too small, another to big…..everyone loved the lake view.

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